Often when you are starting something new, like college, you may feel very nervous and insecure about your ability to succeed. When most people feel this way they tend to focus on what they are lacking and how much better other people seem to be handling things. Here is a little secret…EVERYONE feels this way when they are worried or nervous and dealing with the unknown. So, you’re asking yourself…”how does my Self Regard (Self-Esteem) even affect my academics, or even my future career?”
If you go through your life and everyday focus on what you are missing, you place less attention and importance on what you DO bring. Students who have a healthy self esteem, tend to ask questions when they don’t understand, approach their professors to clarify their learning, ask for what they need to be successful on a project and generally take charge of their own learning experience. If you focus on what you are lacking, why would you think that you are worthy of asking for what you need? Everyone brings something to a group, or a task, in every situation. I have been a counsellor for a long time and I am yet to find someone who brings no positive aspects to any given situation. You do, however, need to let people see those positive traits and abilities!
Building your Self Regard (Self Esteem) will help you to take advantage of career opportunities, set and achieve higher goals and help you to enhance every aspect of your personal life by helping you get connected to other people.
Today…try to think about what great things other people have said about you, what you think you do well and what you “almost” have mastered in your life. Try it! Your brain goes where you focus it!
“Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, try thinking about what you have,that everyone else is missing.”
I look forward to your questions and comments!
Heather Drummond, EdD (Counselling Psychology)
Success Coach @ Mohawk College