If you don’t believe in yourself, even a little, it is very difficult to push yourself to try new things. Trying out and taking on new things in life helps you to learn about your capabilities and develops your personal resilience. Personal resilience comes from the belief that you can make it through even the most difficult times… a kind of “this too will pass” attitude. Yes, life is going to throw curve balls and sometimes it will be brutal, but believing (drawn from past successes) that you will find a way is crucial to your academic, career and personal success in life. Believing that you are capable of more helps you seek out and attend training that helps you build your study skills, motivation, academic confidence or even participating in the eLearn Success Coaching modules 😉 (elearn.mohawkcollege.ca) Even if you don’t have a high level of confidence in yourself, and you are definitely not alone in that feeling, start pushing yourself a little bit each day to try something out of your comfort zone that leads you closer to who you want to be in this world. IF you do this, you are actually unveiling who you are destined to be…your full potential.
Take a moment to think about a time where you really believed that you were capable of something, because of past experience, where you had to work at a skill or ability to master it. With that newly acquired skill, where you able to build on it and surprise yourself?…said to yourself “I didn’t think I would pass…could finish it…could approach that person…could deal with it (you fill in the blank)…but I did!” Think about those times that your confidence in yourself led you to try something new…now use it when you are unsure and move forward and try it or just do it!!
Start building your bank of positive experiences that helps you draw on in times that push you to stretch and grow into the student, the employee and person you are capable of being!
Heather Drummond, EdD (Counselling Psychology)
Success Coach @ Mohawk College
Theme: Self Regard – Assessing Strengths
Twitter Quote: “To establish true self-esteem we must concentrate on our successes and forget about the failures and the negatives in our lives.” Denis Waitley
A big thank you to all of you who showed up at the Smart Start Launch of the Online First Generation Success Coaching with me yesterday! It was a great turn out with such a great group!
“…concentrate on our successes…” It sounds easier than in really is, but it just takes a bit of practice to shift your focus! Often when we find ourselves in stressful situations, like starting a college program, our brains can naturally fall into a “fight or flight response” pattern which can cause us to focus on our negative thoughts. This would be a good thing if you were running away from something dangerous…then you really should think negatively and run! But…school stress can bring on a similar response, but in this case you are focusing on your failures in the attempt to prepare for the worst. This does not tend to help students be successful. Focusing on what you do well, what you have been successful at in the past and what experience you bring to the classroom, helps you to lower your stress levels which then boosts your brain function; and then, like magic, you are able to remember more and learn more efficiently. Focusing on your success can help you in social situations to be more comfortable sharing the good things about yourself and being truly interested in the lives of others at the same time. A success focus can build the right level of confidence that is communicated to potential employers in job interviews. Going into a job interview focusing on your failures is not the right frame of mind needed to communicate why they should hire you.
Negative thinking leads to stress, which leads to a sluggish brain…so focus on what you do well today!
Today…take a moment to write down 3-5 successes that you have had in your life and in every situation today think about how those successes have led you to where you are today…a college student!
Emotional Intelligence Theme: Self Regard – Assessing Strengths
Twitter Quote: “Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, try thinking about what you have, that everyone else is missing.” Unknown
Often when you are starting something new, like college, you may feel very nervous and insecure about your ability to succeed. When most people feel this way they tend to focus on what they are lacking and how much better other people seem to be handling things. Here is a little secret…EVERYONE feels this way when they are worried or nervous and dealing with the unknown. So, you’re asking yourself…”how does my Self Regard (Self-Esteem) even affect my academics, or even my future career?”
If you go through your life and everyday focus on what you are missing, you place less attention and importance on what you DO bring. Students who have a healthy self esteem, tend to ask questions when they don’t understand, approach their professors to clarify their learning, ask for what they need to be successful on a project and generally take charge of their own learning experience. If you focus on what you are lacking, why would you think that you are worthy of asking for what you need? Everyone brings something to a group, or a task, in every situation. I have been a counsellor for a long time and I am yet to find someone who brings no positive aspects to any given situation. You do, however, need to let people see those positive traits and abilities!
Building your Self Regard (Self Esteem), will help you to take advantage of career opportunities, set and achieve higher goals and help you to enhance every aspect of your personal life by helping you get connected to other people.
Today…try to think about what great things other people have said about you, what you think you do well and what you “almost” have mastered in your life. Try it! Your brain goes where you focus it!
If you are interested in further working on building your skill and strengths in the area of Self Regard (Self Esteem), check out my Self Regard E-Learn module! All you need to do is email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and I will add you to my class list. Once you have access you can work on this strength building are as well as 14 others….curious!?!?! You know you want to join me this semester…come on! ;-).
Thanks for joining me! My name is Heather Drummond and I am a counsellor at Mohawk College. This academic year, I will be creating an online presence to help students to be as successful in their academic endeavors as they can be. You will be able to follow me, and learn, on Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook, YouTube, and if you are a Mohawk Student, on E-Learn. If you join in, you will find various learning and skill building opportunities that will help you develop the strengths and competencies necessary for academic, career and personal success. The weeks through this semester will be organized around the 15 competency areas of Emotional Intelligence developed by Dr. Reuvan Bar-On (www.reuvenbaron.org).
Check it all out!
Looking forward to Tweeting and Tumblin’ with you!
Heather Drummond, M.Ed. (Counselling Psychology)